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INTRODUCTION
Planning a wedding can be very exciting but also expensive and stressful. If you are not careful, your wedding expenses can wreck your financial future if you don’t have a plan. Talking about your finances with your future spouse may be the least exciting part of wedding planning, but it is essential to create the future you hope for. Establishing a money date routine can help you and your partner build wealth and ensure you're financially prepared for your big day and beyond.
HOW TO CREATE A MONEY ROUTINE WHILE PLANNING A WEDDING
WHAT IS A MONEY DATE?
I wrote a blog post about talking with your partner about money, but you may have already heard of the term “money date.” According to Forbes, money can present a considerable challenge in a relationship, and having a regular money discussion or “money date” can help. A money date is a relaxed, regular check-in with your finances. Think of it as a date night but for your finances, where you review your financial situation over a cup of coffee or a nice meal. You can have the money date over wine, coffee, or watching football. You can go out to dinner or eat breakfast while talking over money to make the conversation more enjoyable.
Having money dates while planning for a wedding can help you keep track of your wedding expenses and adjust if necessary. In addition, you can expand to talk about the rest of your finances and improve your overall financial health while drinking coffee or eating breakfast.
SCHEDULE MONEY DATES REGULARLY
Set a specific day and time each week for your money date. Treat it like a non-negotiable appointment. Why schedule it like an appointment? If you don’t intentionally carve out time for your money dates, they will likely not happen. Plan a time that works for you and your partner, like Saturday mornings or Sunday evenings, to discuss your wedding expenses, current finances, and future goals. Mark it on your calendar and treat it as important as any other meeting.
GET PREPARED
Gather all necessary documents and tools beforehand: bank statements, credit card bills, budget app, passwords, calculators, coffee, wine, muffins, etc. Being prepared helps make your money date efficient and productive. Have a dedicated notebook or a digital document to take notes and track your progress over time. This preparation ensures you will save time looking for information during the money date.
PLAN OUT TOPICS TO DISCUSS
Pick a money date topic important to your wedding planning or financial situation. Start by identifying the most pressing financial concerns or goals related to your wedding. Prioritize issues that need immediate attention, and consider rotating through different areas each session to cover all aspects of your finances. Consider these money date topics to discuss.
- Spending: Review bills and your budget, consider automating bill payments, pay off credit cards
- Savings: Saving rate, emergency fund, future savings goals
- Debt: Current debt, wedding debt, current debt payment plan, automating debt payoff
- Investing: Review IRA, 401k, brokerage accounts, real estate, side hustle, businesses, etc.
- Other Financial Essentials: Taxes, insurance (life, health, wedding, identity theft, etc.), charitable giving
- Future Financial Goals: Honeymoon, travel, kids, house, date nights, retirement, taking care of elderly parents
- Identify Improvement: How can you improve your financial system and situation?
- Celebrate Wins: What good thing happened with your finances that you want to celebrate?
I recommend reviewing your spending as part of every money date. However, you don’t have to do all these categories simultaneously. Choose 1-3 categories to focus on during a money date and plan to talk about the others later.
AUTOMATE YOUR FINANCES WHENEVER POSSIBLE
Automating your bills, savings, debt payments, and investments can create a system where your money serves you and your goals. The book “Automatic Millionaire” by David Bach shows how powerful automating your finances can be in creating wealth. If you don't know how to do this, call the company on the bill and see if there is an automatic bill payment that you can sign up for. I recommend automating your finances to get your money working hard while planning your wedding. Just make sure you stop automatic payments for any bill, subscription, or service that isn't necessary or you aren't using so you aren't constantly charged.
SET A TIME LIMIT
You may feel you need several hours to do your first money date. The first couple of times my partner and I did a money date, we could have spent the whole day discussing money. Don’t fall into this temptation. Why? After about 1 hour of talking about money, you may get tired, and the meeting may become less productive. Set a time limit of 15-60 minutes for a money date, then take a break.
If you have more things to discuss, decide on a time to discuss them later, possibly during next week’s money date. Having a set timeframe can set more realistic expectations of what result you want to create at the end of the time. After a while, these weekly discussions will become routine, and you can finish efficiently within 15-30 minutes.
PLAN FOR YOUR NEXT MONEY DATE
When you start on a money date, you may feel anxious and want to go over everything simultaneously. Don’t overwhelm yourself. Review your wedding expenses and bills, then schedule another money date for next week.
In addition, consider learning more about a money date topic in preparation for the next money date, such as investing or debt payoff. Decide on a financial issue you want to learn more about and set goals for your next money date. Maybe you want to create a wedding budget that supports your future. Or, perhaps you want to discuss if hiring a wedding planner is worth the expense.
Talk to your partner about your next money date topic and what you want to learn more about. You can read a book on personal finance, listen to podcasts, or attend a workshop. One book or audiobook to consider is “Smart Couples Finish Rich” by David Bach, which walks couples through a comprehensive, step-by-step program to make financial plans for the future. Remember, continuously educating yourself on money can empower and encourage you to grow wealth while planning a wedding.
OTHER PLANNING CONSIDERATIONS
- Net Worth: Your net worth is the difference between your assets and liabilities, and tracking your net worth lets you see your financial progress. I wrote about how important tracking your net worth can be in helping you build wealth while planning a wedding in this blog post. Tracking my net worth and watching it grow helped me feel ok with spending so much money on a wedding. Calculate your net worth at least annually as a financial check-in. I use Simplifi to track my net worth, but several budgeting tools or apps can help you, too. For more information about net worth and improving your finances, check out the book “The Bogleheads' Guide to Investing” by Mel Lindauer et al.
- Credit Score: Monitor your credit score annually to ensure it remains healthy. A good credit score can save you money on loans and insurance. In addition, address any errors on your credit report promptly. You can check your credit score for free annually or use identity theft insurance services like Aura or LifeLock, which will let you check your credit score and protect your identity.
- Annual Financial Review: Check your overall finances and wedding expenses and plan for the upcoming year. Do you need to adjust your insurance? Are you planning a few trips in addition to your honeymoon? Are you saving for a house? These annual reviews let you change your finances and prepare for the upcoming year.
CONCLUSION
Establishing a consistent money date routine ensures you build wealth and stay on top of your finances while planning your wedding. This routine will help you and your partner align with your financial goals and prepare for a successful future together.
IN SUMMARY
How to Create a Money Date Routine While Planning a Wedding
- A money date is a relaxed, regular check-in with your finances.
- Schedule money dates regularly.
- Get prepared.
- Plan out topics to discuss in the following categories:
- Spending.
- Saving.
- Debt.
- Investing.
- Financial essentials: taxes, insurance, etc.
- Future financial goals.
- Identify improvements.
- Celebrate wins.
- Automate your finances whenever possible.
- Set a time limit.
- Plan the next money date.
- Other planning considerations:
Are you ready to set up a money date routine?
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